In Internal Discussion

Part of my mind: Okay. Okay. Whew. Take a deep breath. The kids are out of the house now and the baby just went to sleep. Now, okay, you have an awful lot to do right now, and a lot of things are riding on this time that you got, but I would like to suggest that you straighten up the house first. It will be much easier to think once everything is neat and clean and put away.

Another part of my mind: Good idea, I totally hear that, but you have to cook for Shabbas anyway and that'll make a mess anyway, so why don't you just start with that? Cook and then clean.

Yet another part of my mind: Guys, guys, guys. Listen, I know you both mean well. But thing is, you are way behind on your writing schedule. You have that big feature that you haven't even started on even though you assured your editor that it is "on its way," and pages of unanswered questions about how to proceed with the serials within the next five chapters of each. You have five ideas, not five stories, and you promised your other editor that you are totally looking over the book and about to send it to her--I think you used the word "cusp," which is a bad word because no one even knows what cusp means but you are not on the cusp of anything anyway; if computer files could gather dust, the book is layers deep. You have a lot of thinking and writing to do, and I'm sorry, but that's just going to have to take priority.

More mind parts: Hey! Hey! Breakfast! Breakfast!

Mind part number five: I hear you all, I really do. But here's what I'm thinking. Why don't you instead of all those things go on YouTube and watch soldiers reuniting with their families? Because then you can stew in the murky and stale juices of regret when the baby gets up before you get anything done at all.

The rest of my mind: Awesome! That is so the plan!

So.

How have you guys been?