Finding myself in the Middle East

Sunday, January 15, 2012

Ice Cold Derriere Ponderings

We don't have heat.

Things that cause me to flap my hands like a possessed chicken as a result:

Coming out of the shower.

Getting out of my bed.

The hot water urn finishing, and me only on my fifth cup of coffee.

The toilet seat.

To name a few.

But sometimes I think that you know, it's winter, and it's cold in my house, and that makes sense.

In fact, sometimes I think that that is one one of the reasons that I live in a country where the butcher doesn't wear a hairnet or gloves;

For the salmonella! realness of it all.

Have you ever been to someone's house on the summer and they have the air conditioner on so high you need to wear a sweater? And the heat on so high that you strip to your lightest layer? Is't that a little weird?

I feel cold when it is cold, and hot when it is hot. I do not glide up an elevator and barely realize that I live on the fourth floor; I trudge up 4 flights of steps, because I live on the fourth floor, and that's a lot of steps!

I live on the plane of existance that I live on.

Speaking of planes, I think of this when I travel by airplane. I think a lot of the disorientation that we dismiss as jet lag is really our mind and body saying, "huh? Where are we?" Because we are 6,000 miles away in a different country now, and you know that feeling when you leave your stomach on a bump on a country road? So our head is still back there, and our body is feeling the pull between two continents. There was simply not enough time to get from here to there, so we must still be there, our minds insist while our bodies go check out the local color.

Not to bite off more than I can chew, but there are so many things in our lives that play out this way, our body feeling the pull as our brains cannot settle in one location.Instant food, for example. I did not cook that, says our brains when the pizza gets delivered. what just happened? And we overeat, to compensate for the lack of preparation, for the lack of dicing, preheating, the smells, the anticipation.

Either I am right about this, or I am just trying to make myself feel better about my ice cold toilet seat.

Yeah, that's probably it. Ignore this whole post. I hear Dr. Pizza has a coupon in the Pirsumit, and I need another cup of (instant) coffee.


Cymbaline said...

I appreciate your attempts to tie in your authentic israeli experience with freezing your ass off. Kudos. Whatever gets you through the day!!

CantStopBaking said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
CantStopBaking said...

I totally get you here! Although I have to say, our first winter in the states, I said at least 3x a day "Wow, central heat is sooo nice." I still mention every night to Big D. "remember when it was so cold at night that you woke up still cold in the morning?" Ah, those were the days...totally worth it though!!

JerusalemStoned said...

Cymbaline, you made me snort coffee out of my nose. It does indeed get me through the day. :)

Can'tStop--I hear an icy-cold apartment is opening up soon in my 'hood....

Cymbaline said...

mmmm coffee

Proud Tante said...

Are you sure about that coupon was printed?

JerusalemStoned said...

Absolutely not sure. I might have hallucinated.


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